The Wonderland Cafe [Open]

Takes place third week of the fourth month on a Sunday.

"Follow us down the rabbit hole into a world made just for you."

The slogan of the fantasy cafe was printed on the door inside a painted speech bubble with the tail pointed at the doorknob. Inside the cafe was decorated like a fantasy land of colors and candy. The floor was paved with smooth marble tiles painted red and black like a chess board. The tabletops had no legs and appeared to be floating about a meter off the ground when in reality it was a trick of magnets at the bottom and hidden beneath the floors, set up in a way that kept the tabletops floating in a fixed place perfectly. The same was for the chairs with much shorter legs then they should have had but like the tables were floating in the air. Tea trays, tea sets, and classic paintings hung in the air by a much simpler trick of black painted wires, occasionally made to bob up and down.

By holographic projection there were butterflies with buttered toast for wings flying around and white rabbits hopping around. Normal waitresses were dressed in Buckingham palace guard uniforms except with a print resembling a playing card on their chests and a mask that made them appear faceless. There were also other waiters wearing white suits and huge helmets that covered their entire head shaped like chess pieces.

They went around taking orders with muffled voices, coming in and out of the kitchen door with orders of cakes and drinks. It was only when a customer would point to the special menu on the table that any of these costumed waiters would do anything different from the norm.

"I'd like to meet The Cat," a female customer said pointed at the top picture on the menu.

Her waiter, dressed like an overgrown white bishop, quickly shuffled away and spoke into a small microphone attached to his cuff.

The lady customer waited patiently at her table when suddenly a pair of eyes appeared in front of her to her surprise. They blinked at her before disappearing. Then a violet and gray striped tail attached to nothing appeared next to her and brushed over her shoulder and against the side of her next making her shiver and giggle before disappearing.

She looked around trying to see what would come next. She turned around trying to look behind and when she turned back, a tall man was there, crouching on the hunches on his feet. He wore dark grey jeans and a violet vest over a grey dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to below his shoulders. On each arm were leather gloves that reach up to his elbows, each finger and palm possessing a soft pad like a cat's caw, longer nails about the size of a pen tip on each finger and thumb. Attached to his belt was a long striped tail ending with a big puff of fur. Tied around his neck was a grey scarf with huge bells tied to ends. Purple stripes were drawn over his cheeks resembling cat whiskers and he had violet eye shadow lining the edge of his eyes making them seem even more feline.

His natural cat ears twitched as Cheshire nervously tried to place his glasses and stared at the female customer before him who looked at him with high expectations.

"W-welcome to Wonderland Alice," Cheshire stammered nervously as he followed the employee's manual on greetings, "I am Cheshire The Cat. D-do you want to play... nya?"

Cheshire averted his eyes, his face reddening as his mouth formed into a triangle. "I-It's not like I'm lonely or anything," Cheshire mumbled to the side diverging from the manual in his anxiety. His cold actions seem to have a much more positive effect on the lady customer then he expected and she let out a small squeal to Cheshire's confusion.

Meanwhile a waitress was walking away from a table with three women mumbling into her cuff link. Suddenly the ceiling panels above the same table opened up and the floating tabletop the three girls sat around shot into the opening. Seconds later, a full end table was lowered down by visibly nothing. The table was topped with twenty different kinds of tea and plates of cakes, cookies, and sweets of all sorts. The main attraction was at the center of the long table, lying on his side, his head resting against hi his clenched fist, a smile on his face and a big red top hat on his head. When the table full lowered the man wearing the white sparrow tailed coat and checkered pants, holding onto a striped cane with his free hand, was looking right at the three ladies with a smile on his face.

"Welcome to Wonderland my Alice," Byron said with a soothing and dreamlike voice, "I am Hatter The Mad Man. Welcome to my mad tea party."

"What do you recommend," one girl with lone black hair deadpanned looking disinterested. Her giddy looking companions look like they had dragged her here without her consent.

"I recommend the Drink Me tea, our house specialty," Byron says without moving from his model pose.

"Is it good?" the girl asked still looking uninterested as she stared at the menu rather then Byron.

"I do believe it would go well."

"Go well with what?"

"Go well with you of course," Byron answers as he leans slightly towards her. Before she could react he touched his middle finger on her throat and stroked it upwards her neck, across the tender flesh below her jaw, and stopped at her chin where he tickled it with his still stroking middle finger with a tentative smile on his face as he looked into her eyes which have widened, her face reddening as his small action made her gradually lift her head up and stare at him.

"Oh yes," Byron whispered, "You would go well with a cup of tea."

"I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-"

As the girl continued to stammer uncontrollably, a nearby pair of women found themselves facing a man wearing a red waist coat with a handsome face rolling towards them rapidly in a wheelchair.

"I'm late! I'm late! For a very important date!" He skidded to a stop in front of the two women. "...With you my dear," Rider says seductively. "Welcome to Wonderland my Alice. I am Rider The White Rabbit. May I show you a wondrous time?"

"Um... is it too late to request the Madman?" one of the ladies asked, a little skeptical about being served by a guy in a wheelchair, as handsome of a face he has.

"D- Do you not like me?" Rider said staring at them with watery eyes. He leaned his body over, a slight quiver to his lips, his rabbit ears dropping over his face, flopping lifelessly to the sides. His finger fidgeted, cuffed up like puppy paws as he brought them up to a few inches below his face.

"Y-you can stay!" one of the women quickly said, completely taken in by his sad bunny look.

"I'm so happy!" Rider exclaimed with a perfect smile on his face like a child. He took the women's hands into his and leans in closer saying, "I am at your service oujo-sama. Command me as you will."

"That's unfair! Say that to me too!" the other other lady whined.

"Wh-what do you recommend to drink?"

"I recommend our house specialty, the Drink Me tea," Rider stated.

"I hear that's really sweet. I don't really like sweet things," the other lady stated.

Rider takes his hands away from the first woman and leans towards the other, placing his finger against the bottom of her chin and lifting her head head slightly staring straight into her eyes.

"Then what if I let you drink it out of my mouth?" he asked seductively.

"Th-Then I would drink it...."

The occasional male customer was also sitting around the cafe, mostly with laptops open and surrounded by paperwork. The cafe offered quality wireless internet connection and the atmosphere was relatively relaxing.

One male customer, trying a bit too hard to hide his face, was pointing at the last picture on the Service Menu to a white rook waiter who soon walked away talking to his cuff link.

Moments later, the customer heard the tapping of light footsteps behind him. He turned around and was greeted by a small girl in a red maid uniform with a short skirt and stripped knee socks.

"What do you want to piece of trash?!" Alice yelled at his with crossed arms, the crown on her head glinting. "What do want from The Queen Heart!"

"I- I would like--"

"You're too slow scumbag!" Alice shouted. "Order already! Quickly! This instant! Immediately! Now! Now! Now!"

"C- COFFEE!"

Alice turned her nose from the man like he was something revolting. "That's it? You're wasting my time you disgusting maggot!"

"I-I'm sor-"

Alice interrupted him with a stomp of her foot and she raised her leg and slammed it down on the seat of an empty chair, scowling at his like something distasteful.

"Do you want to die??" Alice screamed. "Bow before The Queen or OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!"

"Yes your majesty!" the man said kneeling sounding far too happy then he should have been.

Each table shared these Special Service menus, featuring a head shot of each available host with a vague description of each one.

The Cat: Appearing anywhere and everywhere. Knows everything about the world and about you. Play with The Cat. He gets lonely easily.

The Madman: He will show you a world of nonsense. A dapper man who will show you what it truly means to go insane.

The White Rabbit: Always running, always chasing. Be charmed by our prince as he shows you a world made only for you.

The Queen: Cute but deadly. Off with your head!

Each host and hostess had their own price, increasing in expense the lower the list goes. Underneath the menu is a special offer available to any customer.

The Wonderland challenge: One by one each host will be seated with you. You must manage to charm each host before they charm you or before the fifteen minute time limit is up. Any sign of blushing or "going ga ga" will result in disqualification on either party. Succeed and your meal is free. Fail and your bill is doubled by the amount of host you were unable to charm.

In the back locker room, the four stars of the Wonderland challenge are lounging around tiredly in exhaustion.

"The things I do to earn money," Cheshire grumbled with crossed arms as he leaned against a locker. "I just want to disappear every time I have to appear."

"At least we're making girls smile," Byron grinned as he fixed his neckerchief in the looking glass. "Nothing's more valuable right?"

"I personally can't wait for to be requested again," Rider stated as he munched on some baby carrots from a veggie platter on the miniature buffet table they had.

"Something tells me you're not doing much acting," Alice deadpanned as she tightened the large bow on her back making her look like an overgrown wrapped present.

"You're one to talk," Cheshire mumbled before sipping from a glass of milk. "You seem a bit too good at this."

"Hey, if you're going to do a job might as well try to enjoy it," Alice shrugged.

"Though, I think you might be enjoying it a bit too much." A voice said from behind Alice, it carried a certain weight to it, though it belonged an older woman.

"Hey Byron, figured I'd find you here." Said another, this one being a very familiar one to the mad hatter, "You really got the whole "mad hatter" look down."

"Who are-" Cheshire said looking over.

"Robin!" Byron exclaims with his signature smile, his arms spread as if waiting for a hug, "I never thought I'd see you here!"

"Specifically here," Cheshire murmured as he stepped away from the locker he leaned on. "This is the employee locker area. Anyone not an employee has to be seated at the front and either order something from a waiter or request a special service."

"Oh come now Cat, loosen up a bit. She is an acquaintance of Byron's," Rider says as he wheeled towards Robin with a charming smile on his face.

"No stage names in the locker room," Cheshire growled.

"It is a pleasure to meet you little Robin," Rider greets with a small bow of his head. "Or have you come to be our little Alice? How may we help you today?"

"No wonder he's the second most expensive," Alice deadpanned, "None of this is forced at all to him."

"Says a lot about you doesn't it?" Cheshire murmured.

Robin took a step forward and embraced Byron in a hug, one that lifted him off the ground despite Robin being smaller then him.

The older woman raised an eyebrow, "Little Alice?"

Letting Byron down, and leaving his ribs slightly sore, Robin looked to Rider, "Ah, I just heard about this place and figured that Byron would be here. It sorta matches his fetishes after all." Robin took a step back and motioned to the older woman, who had dark hair and was dressed in full roman armor, "Oh, and this General Duilia Matida, she's my friend."

"A pleasure," Rider says flashing his princely smile, "Will we have the pleasure of serving you ladies this fine afternoon?"

"Oh, I had not considered that," Byron chuckled feeling no sign of soreness as he placed his hand his hand and twirled his cane. "Did you come here just to request the Mad Man services?" Byron had a mischievous look to his smile, a small chuckle escaping his lips.

"It's getting harder and harder to tell when you guys are acting," Cheshire deadpanned.

David had been wondering around for a while now. Man.........could use something to snack on. He looked at the strange building as he walked by it. Wonder.....Café?. He took a few steps in, and found the place, very familiar. Oh good lord. He looked around and saw a table. He went over and took a seat. So far...so good.

David did not have to wait too long before a waiter walked towards his table, his headwear shaped shaped like a giant horse head like a white knight chess piece.

"How may I help you?" a muffled voice came from the chess piece waiter. "Would you like a selection from our special service menu?"

David watched the man for a few seconds. "Um........special?" David answered not sure what he meant. Why does this feel like its going to end badly. David thought as he began to relax.

The chess piece waiter gestured to the laminated menu standing upright on a stand on the table. The menu listed off four specialty waiters and a waitress, each with a special title and vague description.

The Cat: Appearing anywhere and everywhere. Knows everything about the world and about you. Play with The Cat. He gets lonely easily.

The Madman: He will show you a world of nonsense. A dapper man who will show you what it truly means to go insane.

The White Rabbit: Always running, always chasing. Be charmed by our prince as he shows you a world made only for you.

The Queen: Cute but deadly. Off with your head!

David turned pale at the sight of 'The Cat', but got better when he saw the 'he' in it. Oh thank god. David shrugged. "The mad man." How bad can he be.....not as bad as Byron I bet.

The chess piece waiter seemed to pause for a bit but shrugged saying, "Okay sure. We don't discriminate." He walks away muttering into his cuff link.


In the locker room, Byron's pager rings and he hears his orders from the tiny earpiece he wore.

"Excuse me," he smiled to Robin and her friend, "But I've just been requested. We'll talk later." He walks away and disappears behind a door labeled "Mad Man's passageway.


Moments later the ceiling panels above David opened up and the floating tabletop he sat around shot into the opening. Seconds later, a full end table was lowered down by visibly nothing. The table was topped with twenty different kinds of tea and plates of cakes, cookies, and sweets of all sorts. The main attraction was at the center of the long table, lying on his side, his head resting against hi his clenched fist, a smile on his face and a big red top hat on his head. When the table full lowered the man wearing the white sparrow tailed coat and checkered pants, holding onto a striped cane with his free hand, was looking right at David with a smile on his face.

"Welcome to Wonderland Alice-" Byron started but stopped realizing who it was, though the smile remained on his face. "Oh my, little birdie? .... I didn't realize you swung that way."

David's eyes widen at his voice. "What the hell do you mean by that? I saw café and needed something to eat. Wait....Byron? What are you doing here?" David was confused. He saw café and thought it was a café. "The last café I was at got me put in the hospital. So I figured anything beats that."

"For my own reasons I required a little extra cash," Byron said, still lying down in his model pose, "So I'm working her for a while. The only other place hiring was Old McDonald's Little Restaurant and frankly this seemed more fun. I feel at home for some reason. Not sure why. As for this cafe, I do belief you do not realize what type of establishment this is."

Byron's eyes looked upwards as he was deep in though trying to find the best way to explain things.

"This is a host cafe," Byron deadpanned, "If you order the special service you order a host. You ordered me and now it's my job to charm you. Most male customers would rather order The Queen, but we don't discriminate. We don't mind in the slightest on which team you play for so long as you pay the bill."

David's face turned bright red. "Host.....Café?" He reached back and hit a small button on his back. His flight helm collapsed over his face. "Please don't do that man." David was completely embarrassed at this. and his voice showed it. "How about I just pay and pretend this never happened?"

"Aw~ but where would the fun in that be little birdie?" Byron grinned. He reached over and flicked David's forehead and chuckled playfully. "Don't you want to have some nyan~? Let's enjoy this mad tea party."

"Oh, it happened."

Robin was suddenly to their side, holding her scroll with the camera out.

"Say cheese!" She said, apparently taking a picture.

------

Duilia looked at the three actors, an awkward silence overcoming the scene, "....If I may ask, why do you refer to your customers as "Alice?"

David simply dropped his head into his hand. "I see Cheshire is back. Robin take that picture, and I swear to god, I will the rip skull out of your head, and beat you to death with it." He said with flames in his eyes.

A small click could be heard.

"Too late."

Byron flashed a piece sign at the camera right before the decisive click and flash, a carefree smile on his face. "We have a policy against taking surprised pictures by the way," Byron stated, "But I'll let it slide since it's you. What's wrong little birdie?"

Meanwhile in the locker room, the lady clad in roman armor asked the remaining special service employees the awkward question regarding the cafe's policy.

"The cafe is themed after a famous novel," Cheshire stated, "The main protagonist's name is Alice, a little girl who fell into a fantasy world of nonsense. To further the fantasy experience we call our customers by the name of the protagonist. Well, except for our Queen here."

"I call the men something a lot more graphic," Alice deadpanned, "It's what they get. Perverts."

David slammed his head on the table. "Kill me now......wait robin what are you doing here?" He asked slightly confused. He looked at his watch, and then back to Robin.

"She was looking for me," Byron answered with a cheeky smile, "Our cute little leader apparently came to this host cafe in search of my presence. How quaint isn't it?"

"Perks of being team leader." Robin said, shrugging, "But to answer your question David, I heard about this place and I knew about Byron's fetish, so I basically put two and two together. Also, how's the food here?" She asked abruptly to Byron, "Duilia kinda has...Well, how can I put this....A bottomless stomach."

-----

"Queen? Then you are the antagonist of that book." Duilia said, nodding, "I see, it fits you."

David looked back at his watch. "Crap lunch breaks over." He dug into his wallet and got the amount needed to pay the bill. "I need to head to work, Del will murder me if I'm late. Robin go ahead and take my spot. See you guys at school." He got up and ran out the door, knocking a familiar Faunus over. "Sorry." He said as he ran to work. "I'm late, I'm late, I'm Late!."

Sam stood up and dusted her self off. Ass. She walked in, and waited. The waiter arrived, and she ordered the Cat.

"I don't what you mean by fetishes but I do feel quiet at home here," Byron states still lying on his side. "As for the food it's mostly sweets. I am obligated by the manual to recommend the Eat Me Cakes and the Drink Me Tea."

"For your information my real name is Alice," Alice stated with her hands on her hips, "And I'm just doing this so that I can eat. The manager even lets me take the leftovers. The people at the slums have been at good spirits ever since I took up this job. You can't imagine how hard it is for a homeless girl to get by."

It was then that Cheshire's pager range and his ears twitched hearing his orders. "That's my cue then," Cheshire groaned with a tired sigh before literally vanishing.

Sam did not have to wait for long before she heard the chimes of cat bells. Suddenly a pair of eyes appeared in front of her to her surprise. They blinked at her before disappearing. Then a violet and gray striped tail attached to nothing appeared next to her and brushed over her shoulder and against the side of her cheek.

The sound of bells was heard behind her that would grab her attention and make her look back. Quickly after, Cheshire appeared on the tabletop, crouching on the hunches of his feet. He wore dark grey jeans and a violet vest over a grey dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to below his shoulders. On each arm were leather gloves that reach up to his elbows, each finger and palm possessing a soft pad like a cat's caw, longer nails about the size of a pen tip on each finger and thumb. Attached to his belt was a long striped tail ending with a big puff of fur. Tied around his neck was a grey scarf with huge bells tied to ends. Purple stripes were drawn over his cheeks resembling cat whiskers and he had violet eye shadow lining the edge of his eyes making them seem even more feline.

"Welcome to Wonderland my Alice-" Cheshire began reciting the usual greeting when he realized who he was looking at. His face reddened and soundless air was flowing out of his gaping mouth. No no no, anybody but someone I actually know. Anybody but my teammate dammit the usually cool headed leader of Team DRMS screamed inside his head. He quickly retained his usual cool demeanor and tried to feign off his identity, hoping the outfit was enough to trick the faunus girl.

"H-How may I help you," Cheshire mumbled averting his eyes, "I- It's not like I want to or anything..."

"Eat me Cakes? Drink me Tea? Do they make you smaller or bigger?" Robin asked, titling her head.

---------

"Ah, my apologies. I did not mean to insult you." Duilia said, bowing apologetically.