An Aphology

"I asked for it. You came to apologize, and instead I just asked for sex. You asked to be put into heat, I complied. All the blame's on me." Aphelion frowned at the hug and started writhing himself free, "Let go of me! I need time alone to think... I hurt you already, isn't it enough? There won't be any more ****, I know. I need... some... solitude..." he started weeping and quickly turned his face away from her.

"Well there we have it!" Maria snapped, hugging him tighter. "I asked you to! I wanted this and you gave it, quit feeling guilty!" Despite his request for solitude, Maria stays put in her spot above Aphelion, hugging him tighter. "I don't want to leave you alone. You'll leave...."

"...if you're worried about me leaving, lock me up somewhere. I don't care, I just need to be alone. I can't look at you, I'm too guilty and too tempted at the moment..." Aphelion gulped and looked away once more, "Please... Hell, you can tie me up and blindfold me... Just give me some time."

"No." Maria said, still not letting go though she started to shift down. "I'm not leaving you alone. No one should be alone.... I-if the only reason you can't let me be here is cause you're tempted then I sate you first then stay with you. Then you won't have any excuses." With that, Maria shifts down even more, tears still held back as she got to work.

[Sad half fade Q~Q]

"D-Dammit Maria..." Aphelion frowned before gripping the sheets tightly, "I can see you're sad! Don't do it for me, do you realize how it feels to possibly force you into it by my state?" he yelled before pulling away and jumping down to grab his pile of clothes, rolling on the ground and running for the staircase.

"Gah! This is exactly what I didn't want to happen!" Maria yelled, foregoing clothes to save time and running naked through the door and after him. Spotting him going down the stairs, she dives, slamming into his back and wrapping her arms and legs around him as they hit the ground, Maria gasping as he side collided with the floor. "I'm doing whatever it takes to keep you here!"

"Let me go! You don't want me here, I'll drag you into another round of **** and you'll regret it even more!" Aphelion shouted, writhing in Maria's arms helplessly, "Why won't you let me leave and keep you safe from me!?"

"But I do want you here!!!" Maria yelled, rattling the windows as she let the tears flow, dripping onto Aphelion's shoulder as she sobbed against his back, shaking with each breath she took through her clenched teeth and screwed shut eyes. "I'm sick for wanting it... but I do...."

"...Maria..." Aphelion's body fell limply against the floor, feeling her tears hit him, "It would be best if I left right now... You're not sick for wanting it, just... if we did it again... could you live with the consequences?"

"I...." Maria said, feeling her arms and legs go slack as she felt a loss for words. "I couldn't...." She admitted, crying against his back. "But I couldn't live with myself if we ended things like this. I don't want to end things at alll. I... I don't know what to do anymore...."

"Don't run away. I've been shamelessly running away from problems up until now and look where it got me... Admittedly, it's not a bad position from a perverted point of view but... I shouldn't have ran, and... I don't know anymore. It's up to you now, Maria. Your judgement call." Aphelion said, submitting himself fully to the force of her arms.

"Then help me Aphelion." She asked, turning him in her hug to lie face to face on the floor. "Help me think of what to do, what I can do.... Just... help me... please.... I don't want to be alone with this...."

"...Maria, I..." Aphellion started before going silent for a moment, "...Okay, it's the least I can do to attone I guess. Just... can I stay naked while you get dressed? I need to punish myself SOMEHOW..."

"O-ok...." Maria said, regretfully letting go and standing up, holding her elbow. "Just promise me you won't leave...." With that, she climbs back up the stairs, enters her room and gets dressed, having a little trouble finding her clothes and a little embarrassed at the mess they made.

Sighing as she left, Aphelion crossed his legs and arms, sitting and patiently waiting for Maria's return, glancing at the door from time to time. Gah, I should take this opportunity... Though, maybe I should help her...

Maria walked back down the stairs, holding her purse at knee height, hands right in front of her crotch as she tried to ignore how wrinkled her clothes were. Seeing Aphelion the floor, Maria sighs, sitting down on the couch and patting the spot next to her, putting her purse down on the ground. "Okay. I'm dressed.... M-maybe you should be too."

Aphelion shook his head to sit by her, "It's my punishment, at least let me keep that." he said, moving his hands to cover his crotch as he sat beside her, not one body part touching her, "Let's... Let's talk then..."

"O-ok then...." She said, fidgeting awkwardly as Aphelion sat next to her but she didn't move away. Keeping her eyes to the floor, she spoke. "So uhh... should you start or I?"

"You start." Aphelion spoke decisively, "You're more like the victim here, and you're older. So go on." he crossed his legs and noticed her fidgeting, blushing slightly and shifting another bit further away.

"Okay...." Maria said. She heaved a heavy sigh, taking a long breath before she spoke again. "Aphelion, what do you think of us? I mean, we've done this twice already and I've known it was wrong both times but... I enjoyed it and you seem to enjoy it too... I mean... what is this that we're doing?"

"Umm..." Aphelion pondered for a moment, doing his best to not make himself sad again, "Well, I know it's wrong... I just get caught up in the moment and forget about it for quite some time when I'm having fun. Truth be told, it's always like that." he sighed and looked away, outside the window, "I feel bad for making you do it... but I don't want to stop either..."

"I can't say I disagree with you...." Maria said somberly, folding her arms across her stomach. "I get caught up in all the fun stuff that I forget I'm cheating on Imperia.... Heh, and to think I've been avoiding sleeping with her cause I wanted to have a 'non-sexcentric' relationship...." She chuckled dryly at the depressing thought. "What a girlfriend I am...."

''Hey, you're a better girlfriend than I am a boyfriend.'' Aphelion raised hiis hand to pat her shoulder but stopped himself short, ''Look, I... Understand what you meant. Didn't want to feel 'just for sex'. I just kept wanting to **** Aoife but she.... Didn't. Just... If it makes you feel better, youu made me happy, and... W-Well, you can learn things to make her happy too.''

"Yeah well Imperia isn't packing anything you're packing." She joked dryly, trying to get rid of the foul mood. "Well, the real thing at least. Heh heh.... Look Aph, I said it back in the hotel. This isn't right. I'm not supposed to sleep with you. I can't sleep with you... but that doesn't mean I don't want to be with you... y'know what I mean?" She said, struggling to find a way to say 'let's just be friends' without hurting him.

"I... Y-Yeah, I do know... I just... You were having fun... and I was... I wish we could stay the way we were..." Aphelion gulped and dropped his head, "But I know we can't..." he strained his fingers, relaxing and forming fists before he lunged at her and hugged her tightly, "But you're more than just a friend to me..."

"Things are nice like this, yea-" Maria got cut off mid-sentence, yelping as she fell onto the couch, Aphelion on top of her. Taking a moment to calm down, she wraps her arms tenderly around his waist, stroking his back. "You're like that to me too... it's just.... As painful as it is to say, we're not supposed to be like that."

"I know that... but I don't care." Aphelion huffed and pressed himself harder to Maria, "I want us to be like how we are Maria. I want you to be as close to me as you were when you told me about what happened in your past, about being in the White Fang... I want you to be my best friend... or more than that... N-Not my girlfriend! B-But... I don't know how to call it..."